Hello Lovelies
Disclaimer: This blog post is not pointing towards anyone, so do not come and message/E-mail/text me about this blog post. Even if I receive such message, I will delete and ignore. Simple. If you're unhappy, feel free to leave the blog. Thank you.
I am back again to update the space of mine. It's kinda dead uh? Don't have much time to blog nowadays. Well, I'm going to blog about what my title has stated - "Never judge a book by its cover". Why am I blogging about this? Because I have receive a lot of comments and questions like - "You and your 'Husband' looks okay, so I thought you all are back together or so".
The answer is no. I am not back together with him. I don't know how many times I have to repeat over again about this. I don't know how many of the people out there have been using "your husband" to describe him when they talk to me. I am really annoyed and have enough of it. Yes, I know some don't mean it or some do it on purpose. I know who are those who don't mean it and who are those who do it on purpose. I can observe and I know whether you are.
I know why people have the thoughts that we seems alright because we can be really friend and good when I bring my daughters out to meet him up on the Sunday. Reason why is because my daughters are around and I never want to let her see any ugly side of us. She's just too precious to get hurt now as she's still so young. How would she react to when she sees us quarreling, not talking to one another, one tagging behind one, and so? You have never been through and you are not me, you don't know how do I think.
I'm not trying to boast around but my eldest daughter, Shervelle, she can catch up with thing really fast. People who has been reading my blog and follow her milestones should know how much she have learnt within 19 months plus. She can sing, she can talk, express her feeling, etc so what if she see him and I behaving weirdly now and gets confused? I don't want such things to happen, I want to wait till she's bigger enough to understand things then I'll explain to her myself. That's what I want.
Probably, you all thought that I will keep a distance from him and so because he hurt me so much and stuff. Yes, I hate him but that was the past. I have put down the hates and grudges in me because I know it's going to be tiring and waste of time hating and holding onto grudges. Everyone makes mistakes, everyone take times to learn, some are fast while some are slow and probably he belong to the slow category to realize what he has done over the past few years was wrong. I don't blame him. He has his reasons. Everyone has their reasons behind each stories, isn't it?
I have mention before. Letting go is the best way for myself to live better, to be able to love my kids more and concentrate more on them. When you have hates & grudges in your mind, you can't concentrate well on your kids, because you're using some parts of your mind to hate the person, to remember what he/she did to hurt and leave you having so much grudges.
"Only when we are willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the life that is waiting for us".
We might have plans for the future, but some time things just doesn't goes in our ways. Just like we will never know what will happen when we take one step forward after one step, isn't it? What belong to us will still be ours, what doesn't belong to ours just let it go because there's no point holding on also.
Only when you are willing to let go, that's when your life is really set free. If not, you'll be really tired with your life and find thing meaningless and lost. No point letting your life to be like this for someone who don't worth it. And after everything happen, I have learn so much and grow so much. Maybe I should even thank him for all the happenings, if not I will never have learn so much about life.
Yes, back to the topic.
Please never use the term, "your husband" to me anymore because we're separated thou we're still legally Husband & Wife. Use his name or ex-Husband would be so much better :) And remember, don't make any guesses just by what you have see because what you have see might not be what you are assuming alright? :)
