I wanna stay strong, no matter how tough life is going to be.

 

I think December ain't a very good month for me, 

therefore I'm wishing that January will be a better month for me.

It's a very tiring and sick month for me. I hope everything will just end real fast. Because my girl and I are both so sick. Coughing badly. & my asthma attack me again! I guess this pregnancy ain't a easy one at all, but not to blame my lil'baby but myself, because I didn't take good care of myself, sorry baby:(

It was Christmas, 2 days ago -

I'd a little celebration over at Aunt's place on the Christmas eve because it was Cousin Nicole's birthday. Gift exchange and surprisingly, I did receive some chocolates and a Melody cup from my aunt! :D And I did bought Christmas gift this year because I wanna share the joy with people I love ! :) Bought earpiece for brother, and 2 pieces of T-Shirt for sister! :)

& Oh, I mention that baby girl & I was sick. Spend quite a lot seeing doctors already! :( Just hope we'll recover real soon. Especially baby girl, because I don't wanna see her suffer! I don't mind spend such money, but I rather not spend the money because I don't want her to be sick! Its really heart aching to see that she's feeling uncomfortable! :(

Anyway, December is ending real soon. In another 4 days time! That's really fast. In a mood to welcome 2013 already. Wondering if anyone would ask me out for count down, but I think I'll be lazy to do so too, probably I would just spend the night with my daughter or bring her out to see firework, if only she recover! 

& When Jan 2013 arrive, this first two week I'll be pack with appointment. First week will be baby girl's injection and then second week will be my appointment! I can't wait to see my lil'baby! Hope baby will be good to let me see what's the gender! Haha. Health is still important, boy or girl is alright for me! :)

Gonna stay strong for everything that happen! 

I'm gonna conquer them all! 

Love you all, till than, see ya next time! 

17 weeks!

I'M IN MY 17 WEEKS NOW .

 

Hello there! I'm 17 weeks pregnant now :)

Went for my check up, this time round is just for my report and see the doctor. Nothing much. Didn't see my baby much too, only see the little heartbeat! Heh. The baby are doing good and healthy ! ^^ I'm very happy as long as the baby is alright and doing good. 

Everything are doing good. I'll be having my next appointment on the 10th Jan 2013. In another 2 weeks time! This time round I'll see my baby on scan! Heh. Hopefully lil'baby will let me see if my baby is a girl or boy! *pray hard* I've people who told me the baby is boy and also girl, but more on boy. They ask me what gender what I wish for, like I always say, I'm alright with both gender as long as baby is healthy! 

& the next appointment will be on the 11th Jan'13 because on the 10th Jan'13, there's no slot for doctor therefore I've to make two trips. No choice! :( But never at least I can rest. I really can't wait for the day! Please arrive faster! :D

& On the another note, I think I'm falling sick. Throat is in pain now and I feel a little feverish. Hopefully I'll alright tomorrow cos I'm feeling drowsy even though I didn't take any drowsy medicine! :( I DON'T LIKE TO BE SICK. NOT NICE.

Alright, till than I shall blog! See ya !

Shervelle is sick ! :(

My precious love is sick with fever attacking :(

I pray that she'll recover as soon as possible, I don't want see her suffer.

 

Went out with babyS on the Sunday, and end up in the evening she'd fever! 

I realize she has fever when I touches her hand when I was about to hold her, then I took her temperature, it was about 37 degree to 38 degree. Faster take cooling pad and wet towel to put on her head and under her armpit. After that, feed her medicine and she went to sleep later in the night.

In the morning, Mommy told me that to bring her to the doctor. Took urgent leave and rush her to doctor as her fever has not subside. :( Doctor gave medicine, and then she went sleeping. After that, evening time I measure her temperature, it went up to 39 degree! I was really worry! :( Wanted to bring her to Hospital but I'm worry they bathe her cold water! 

Therefore, I head back to the clinic with Mommy. & her fever subside to 37.5 degree. I hope it'll drop soon tomorrow, still under observant, don't feel like sleeping, just wanna look at her and make sure she sleep well. 

I feel that I'm such a fail Mommy, babyS is so small and she has to go through so much with me. What I can do now is to make sure I pay back her with double loves, and everything. To tell her what happen, what's wrong and right, to teach her everything that is right and not wrong, make sure she's growing well and healthy! 

BabyS, no matter what - Mommy will never let go your hand, no matter how tough this journey is going to be, I'll protect everything that harms and hurt you. I definitely will, because you're my precious gems! 

Please recover soon, if not pass it to Mommy because I'm willing to take the illness for you, instead of leet

FUCK OFF :)

 

I was wondering what should I update on my blog.

Maybe I should update something about some one. 

One who is so great at telling lies and even to her own friends, or maybe her friends cover the backside for her too. They're cowards who ask me out, but till now no show up at all and also, they're one that ask me out but they don't want to tell me time & venue. Because they want to sudden appear and surprise me. Haha.

I don't understand. Being a mistress, a third party, she feel so proud and feels no wrong at all. Same goes to her friend who are actually supporting and acting with her. Haha. I wonder if Karma will hit, I guess it will. Since she likes to be, I hope the rest of her life she can only be a woman being hidden up. LOL, no point what since she likes married man. Haha.

At the same time, I think she likes to act a lot too. I wonder why? She told me she's pregnant too, and the baby is my ex-Husband one? Okay. She told me not to tell anyone and especially not to him, why? I don't understand. If you don't want him to know, why you tell me? But whatever that case, I've already told him and he is very sure that you won't be pregnant with his baby, now who should I believe?

But anyway, I've eyes to see. I know what type of people are you because I see you done no good things before and I've proves. What about you? Proof? Any? Your scanning photo, wanna show it out to prove? I'm a Pregnant woman who went to KK Hospital too. For your information, I go through this for the second time so don't be like an idiot and tell me stupid thing. -_- 

If you are really pregnant, then congrats! Because babies are God's Gift. Don't take the gift as a joke and fool around. Don't tell me you're going through ectopic pregnancy. It's an offence to people who had gone through and it's insulting to the gift if you're not. I'll slap you on your face if you really lie about this. 

Another thing, she ever mention to me that I know how it feels like to lost a baby. Fuck you, seriously. My babies are good, they're healthy and I prayed for them. I thank God for giving me them. They grew well, and I never lost them! I was so pissed off when she mention that to me. Don't need to curse me, because I'm better off than you.

I don't target married guys. I don't be a third party. I feel ashamed for you, but I don't think you feel so, don't you? Ever since I know you have an affair with my ex-Husband, I've never really blame you and in fact, I even tell you to leave him because he ain't good, I talk so nicely to you but you're such a hypocrite. You do stuff hurt me, and act one innocent and push to your friend. What the fuck, seriously. 

I always know that both parties are at fault, because it takes two hands to clap. You claim that you didn't know he was married, but after that you know, but what did you do? You push him to divorce with me if not you'll leave but what did he do? He did not, but keep asking me for forgiveness. Don't you feel ashamed and stupid? I feel that for you.

I take you as friend again, but what? He dump you and you ain't happy. I told you I want to revenge, you say you wanna join in. I ask you to do it yourself, you told me what? He is more afraid to lose me. Okay, never mind. & Randomly, you told me to report to police about how he treats me and I didn't reply, you block me. Okay, by all means than.

I ain't a bad woman. Every of my friend know exactly how I treat him and what type of person I am. Though he treats me this way, I can forgive him and be his friend after all he is still the Dad of the children. I'm not those person that would go to the extend to report him and stuff. I'm 19, yes, I'm young and I don't deny I still got more to learn, but what about you? You're 22, but your mindset is still not even matured than me. 

If you are, then how about your Husband having affair out there? How do you feel? I doubt you'll feel upset, because you can do exactly the same thing. Come on la, you ask me to grow up, you grow up yourself first. 

If you are pregnant, concentrate on your pregnancy. Don't take the gift as a joke.

FUCK OFF FROM MY LIFE.

Emotional breakdown.

 

I'm tired, very tired from everything. 

From the world that I'm facing alone right now. This feeling sucks much.

Everything was alright, but mood swinging is kicking in. 

& I'm feeling really emotional nowadays but doesn't seems like anyone understand so.

Probably only pregnant Mommy would understand how it feels uh?

Second trimester has finally kick in like a few weeks ago. 

Nausea is getting lesser, but headache and fainting spell are kicking in.

I'll feel giddy and I get headache really easily. Lately got migraine also.

Hope it'll goes off soon, and I can feel the small movement from lil'baby, magical movement.

Most of the time when I feel baby's movement, are the time when I'm down.

I think baby is comforting me? Lending me the little shoulder that I need so badly.

This two days I ain't feeling good, no good at all. sigh.

I feel so so so tired, emotionally tired and pain.

Tears keep flowing in me, yet I endure not letting it out.

However I couldn't endure that long, 

the tiredness and pain that I'm going through don't allow me to.

I kept quiet because I doesn't want anyone to ask me, "what's wrong?".

♥ Shervelle's First Birthday Celebration!

It's Shervelle's First Birthday Celebration ! ♥

It was Shervelle's Birthday on the 23rd November ! 

I've prepare a small celebration for her at Costa Sand Resort, Pasir Ris ;

on the 24th November 2012 ! 

I went to check in on the 23rd Nov, Friday afternoon with my Mom. After that head home, and then had a small cake cutting at home first and then we headed back to chalet at the evening time with Shervelle, Grandma, Mommy, Sister and Daddy. Mommy & Grandma help to clean up first before letting Shervelle in the chalet as we worry that it was dirty. Aftermath, we waited for two of our aunt to arrive to overnight with Sister & I :) While the rest went home.

We'd a night there and it's terrible. I couldn't get to sleep despite being tired, maybe I'm too excited for the party tomorrow. Worry that it might not turn out well and also the weather and etc. Believe or not, I slept at 5 a.m plus and wake up at around 9 a.m plus. Imagine how tired I am, but I'm not feeling tired at all. 

Waited for Daddy, Mommy, Grandma & Shervelle to come:) & We started to decorate the place with Shervelle's name, Happy Birthday wording banner, snow flakes, fluffy bling bling and balloons! Thanks to all the help from Daddy and Mommy, Grandmother and Aunt! :) Appreciate the help so much! 

 

Some of my friend ask why did I use snow flakes? Because I'm doing Pororo Theme. & Pororo live in mountains that are cover with snow and he is a Penguin! ^^ Therefore snow flake just come to my mind! & I'm glad it matches well with Shervelle's name! :D 

 

 

After all the decorations, we rested and start preparing to bathe and doll my Princess up, and doll myself up too! Heh. Okay. Food came about 1530 hours, my aunt help me BBQ all the food without complaining, I'm very thankful for that! 

Around 1730 hours, all the guest that I've invited slowly arrive and Shervelle receive lots of presents and everyone just keep praising how pretty and cute she is! Haha. That lil girl must be really proud, and I'm proud too! ^^

 

The Pororo theme Cake that I order from Pine Garden. I receive a lot of good comments that the cake are delicious! ^^ As for the BBQ food, I've receive a lot of good comments too! I'm very glad that everything turn out well and food are nice too! :D I like the cake a lot, and Shervelle too! Each time I show her the cake photo, she'll mumble to herself and laughing! :D 

Thank you for all the red packets and presents that Shervelle has receive!

& I'm very thankful that all of you has attend, though some are not free in the last minute. For this, I thank everyone for making Shervelle's First Birthday a very wonderful ONE! 

 

WE L♥VE ALL OF YOU.

THANK YOU !

 ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Shervelle is One ! ♥

My lil Princess, Shervelle is One ♥

You've grow so much and learn so much in just one year,

Mommy love you.

 

On 22nd November 2011,

I remember I was in the labour ward waiting for her arrival. No pain, no contraction, nothing. After the midnight, when the doctor break my water bag, the pain came. It's really pain that I curled myself up, enduring not to take the epidural but in the end, I still took it because I can't take the pain at all. Waiting and waiting till the next morning :

On 23rd November 2011,

I hear her cries. I feel something came out from me. I feel amazing. & I was too tired to cry out my happiness. I just feel that the one I carry her for 9 months wondering how she looks like is out on Earth. When I sees her, I feel even amazed, couldn't believe that I'm a Mommy already. 

And now,

On 23rd November 2012,

My lil Princess has turn one years old.

Time really passes so fast and I still can't believe I'm a Mommy of Two already. I've went through so much with Shervelle. She never fails to bring me up in my life, giving me all the strength and smile to encourage me to move on. In this one year, I've see her grow. From flipping over, to crawling, to standing, to walking and to call me Mommy and give me kisses! I can't denied that I'm tired at times and stressed, but she make all these times worthwhile. :')

♥ Thank you, Shervelle ♥

Mommy will love you now, and always. 

Will always protect you till death do us apart, I promise.

Check up for lilB.

The first check up at KK Hospital for Lil'2ndJoy.

 

Hi there, I'm 14 weeks & 6 days pregnant. 

My baby is growing really well, but my weight still ain't gaining which I don't think it's good but Doctor told me for now it's alright because I'm feeling nausea and had no appetite that explains why I loses weight. I feel more comfort when I heard it, not so worry :) 

Took 4 tubes of blood. OMG. Had scanning for test too. Everything is alright and normal. I'm happy with the result too! :') Mommy came with me for the first check up and the second one is with my Sister! Was so tired because the check up falls one early before Shervelle's Birthday and on Shervelle's Birthday!

Will update again :)

I'll be right back~

 

Hello all lovely readers, 

I'll be right back after I'm done with Shervelle's birthday -

which is in 2 days times .

Let's hope that everything will be smooth!

& also stay tuned for many photos! ^^

No one can bring me down.

Disclaimer : This post filled with emotionals and it's a very personal one. You can go on reading or you can skip it and keep the comments to yourself. & I mention no name, please do not assume that it's you.

 

 

This is me,

I keep myself going even if I know that I'm tired.

 

It was a very pleasant week till I went over to someone's house this weekend.

 

Like I say in my Facebook, I've never seen such person in my life before. It was really a mistake and regret to know someone like that person. I've regret and feel that it was a mistake till last Friday, when that person ask me to go and die straight away NOW on the phone when we're discussing about maintainence fees for the children. & that person requested I should meet up with the Mom, if not he'll not agree to any terms of it. HAHA. What a joke. Seriously, why should I even meet up with the Mom? WHY AM I THE ONE WHO SHOULD GO OVER?!

 

I REJECTED.

 

So, he say alright he won't give the maintainence fee, I told him, I'm alright with it but with the condition that he has no rights to see the children. I'm no wrong. & He goes that he is alright with not seeing the children. Okay, deal than? What's the point seriously? & He say, if my family & I doesn't have the ability to feed her, just bring it out don't take money from him. Wow. I was wondering, does he not feel shameful when he says this? & Even think that if his parent helps "us" before?

 

FYI, I took the maintainence fee not because I can't feed my children, but it's because they were your child too! If you feel that they're not, then by all means and not agree of giving me the maintainence fees. I won't beg you for it, because it was my parent and relatives who help me in buying the food and stuff for my child. NOT YOU OR YOUR FAMILY! Get this clear.

 

I AM REALLY PISSED OFF.

 

From the day when I gave birth. My parents are the one who pay my hospital bills. My parents took only $350 from me to buy BabyS milk powder, pampers and stuff. Tell me, if you're a parent, you should know that $350 is not even enough at all. Calculate it. My parents are the one who went over to places to find cheaper milk powder, even if its cheaper by $1 or $2, they just try to help "us" save the money. If it's not enough, they'll help us fork out and never ask "us" to return at all. NEVER.

 

My aunt are the one that order stuff from online and sent over to our house and when she buy, she never ask me to return also. Milk powder, pampers, tidbits and clothings for BabyS, they are the one that help me with it. Never did they ask anything in return. Because they know that sometimes I don't have so much money.

 

However, those peoples who doesn't appreciate their help or thankful for their help; they take for granted and ask for more. Yeah, who? Those who doesn't help and talk big! Ask me to sign contract with them for 3 years, asking them to sponsor me ! WTF?! SERIOUSLY, have you ever met such person? I never once did, till I met them! JOKE.

 

I admit, I've married. I shouldn't go back to my parent's house too often or always but please think, if you were me to live under such a uncomfortable environment, how would you feel? If you're no one close to me, you won't know what's going on with my life there, it's really uncomfortable. At least, at my house I don't have to worry about anything because my Mom would help me with it.

 

" You won't know if you're close to me.

There are just too many things that are hidden behind the story, I'll never mention because at least I know what is respect and silent wins. I'll shut and not mention till they're really over my very limits. "

 

I would just say, it was my mistake and my poor babies are innocent. & I'll never let them bring me down, because they're not important at all to us, therefore they'll never enter in my life again. NEVER EVER!

 

Alrights, till than.

Loves.

I'm sick.

Hello there!

Yes, just as you see that image - I'm sick!

 

 

 

It's been really long since I've fall sick till so bad, that I am on 3 days of Medical Leaves. Yes, please imagine how bad that can be. At first it was just some sore throat and flu, & it went on coughing and feeling breathless because I can't cough out the phlegm. Yes, that's the most torturing part. & it leads to asthma. Yes, I've asthma history and it has been really long since I relapse till so bad. Spent about 100$ on doctor! Ergh!

 

For the 3 days, I just stay home sleeping and sleeping. I've got no strength at all. It's really bad that I can't even hold / carry my girl. All I can do was lie down on the bed, lie down at everywhere I go in the house. I spammed as much honey water and water to recover ! Yes, slowly I'm recovering.

 

Back to work yesterday and it was really bad. I keep vomiting. I throw up everything I had and I feel extremely uncomfortable and feel pain around my stomach! I am so tired, really so sick and tired of working and feeling so sick! It's terrible, but I can't do anything much! It's getting on my nerves of resigning but I can't because I've to feed my girl therefore I can only endure and endure!

 

This pregnancy is really terrible, not like the first . I just hope that the first trimster can just end as fast as possible which I think in another 1 or 2 weeks more. I can't be any happier than than.

 

Headed to work today, enduring the pain I had around stomach. I thought it was because I didn't eat, but no it's not. I ate and I still feel pain. Sweating somemore! It's really terrible but lucky my leader was understanding enough to let me off early, therefore I'm heading back at 1530hours later on. Just hope that the time would pass faster.

 

I still haven't order the BBQ Food for my girl ! Need to order this week and the next week, I'll have to go down to the cake shop to pass the figurine and for them to do the cakes! Make all the payment and everything. Ergh. Everything are so packed~ Next check up in another week more. Hope I can know the gender of it. There's a lot of things to do the next coming weeks!

 

Till than, I shall update the next time!

Loves.

Baby girl is sick! :(

Life will always be a bitch,

till all those lifeless peoples leave my life alone .

 

Hi there, it's been awhile since I'm blogging. I'm sorry about it, because I was rather busy going out and buy Shervelle's first birthday party decoration. Bought a lot from Daiso and Japan house. There's more for me to buy, LOL. I need really a lot. I'm still headache about the banner, probably I'll just do one myself or print and DIY myself?

My life is just filled with work. That day just went down to the law firm, and talk with the lawyer about what agreement to be put in the separation deed. Had it done, I'll be going down on the 16th Nov after my check up to sign the deed with him. Yes, he has agree to sign because he say he'll prove to me this 3 years, he will change but I don't carry any hopes. 

Other than that, I just went to work and go out. Nothing much.

Yesterday during work around 5pm plus, my Mommy text me and told me Shervelle was having fever :( Temperature 38.4 to 38.9 ! Damn high. Was so worried. Doctor says it was virus , not sure what virus also. May be teething also, that's why . Sigh, cranky girl. 

 

Poor baby ! :( Sigh , so yesterday she was kind of cranky ! Understand, must be uncomfortable. Some more teething ! Aiyo . Hope she'll feel better asap because her big one is coming ! (Y) Prays.

Baby girl and I do look alike right ?
& She's such a big girl already , having a little hard times carrying her too.

 

There you go, my cheeky face Shervelle! 

Alright, till than. Loves! 

Tristan's Sixth Birthday!

Tristan's Sixth Birthday!

We've watch him up from baby to now a children! Time passes so fast.

On the Sunday, 28th October 2012 -

We'd a mini celebration for Cousin Tristan's 6th birthday.

Mommy, Aunts, Grandma and co. went to the market to buy the food, while I stay home looking after my baby girl:) She fallen asleep right after they went out and she wakes up when they return home. LOL. Had brunch, and later soon Mommy went to prepare and cook all the yummy food. *didn't manage to take the photo! :(* Fried chicken wings, nuggets, sotong ball, prawn ball, beansprout with eggs, mixed vegetables! 

Before we'd our dinner, 

we sang birthday songs and take photos with the birthday boy.

 

Tristan with Aunt and Uncle (his mom & dad)

 

Tristan with Mommy and Daddy. (his god-ma and god-pa)

 

 Tristan with Grandmother

 

All the cousins, except for Cousin Nicole!

 

Tristan and Sister (cousins)

Yes, so after that we sing "Happy Birthday" songs and he cut the cake. It's Ice Cream cake from Swenses. It's expensive, LOL. Haha. Anyway, we pass him all the presents and red packet! He was so happy and we took photo for him! ^^

 

 

That was two of the present he receive !

They stayed till around 8pm , and they left home because there is work and school tomorrow. Hope he likes his present and had lots of fun ! Heh . 

Loves.

Nothing's gonna break us apart ♥

No one could ever break us apart,

because the bond is made when she's in my tummy ♥

 

I remember it was on the May 2011, when I came to know her exist in me. I was so panic that I actually bought 3 test kits and tested. All came out to be positive. I was really excited and happy, of cos I feel worry and panic at the same time too. I'm just worry about how to tell my parents about it, but fortunately they're not pissed off and they're supportive. :)

At that time, when I found out about her - she's already 12 weeks plus. I remember I'd the first scan which is the first time I see her, it was at Tampines 1 at Raffles Medical Clinic. It's damn expensive. Haha. At the first check up, the doctor has already tell me that it might be a little girl, therefore I've make it that it's confirm a girl:) And yes, it is a girl! (Y)

 

I carry her for nine months. 

Yes, this nine months ain't a easy one unless you're pregnant yourself. Don't come and tell me it's easy and it's not tiring, bang yourself on the wall than. Anyway, so yes. It's really tiring and not easy. However the first pregnancy was rather a more "comfortable" one. As I mention previously that I don't have much pregnant symptoms. 

Still, it's tiring. You'll have to endure the back ache, the urination getting even frequent, the kicks which is the best feeling ever, the weight of your baby in your womb, the leg cramps at night during your sleep, the heart burning feel and etc. However, it's all worthwhile because Shervelle make every second of it worth it.

& so, I carry her for nine months till November 2011.

I remember, on the previous two nights before I gave birth, I was feeling really uncomfortable. Totally uncomfortable. Recover on the previous day of my birth day, and I thought I'm getting better. Later in the night before I want to head to sleep, I'd spotting and my parent rush me to Hospital. And I was told, I'm giving birth!

I was put on drip for contraction. & it's fucking pain that you'll not know unless you goes through it. And I took epidural so I won't feel any pain. I waited from 10 pm plus till the next morning 8-9 am plus and I gave birth to my cute lil'sweetie pie. It took me almost 12 hours enduring the pain and the uncomfortable feelings.

Till now, after I gave birth to her - I've to endure all this back aching and body getting weaker but I've never ever regret bringing her to the world, because she mean so much to me. These pains are nothing compare to her smile and laughter. It makes me feel so happy and energetic having her to smile and laugh :')

 

Being a full-time Mommy is not easy, especially when you've to work at the same time too. Taking care of a baby ain't easy, it's tiring and it's our, Mommies rights to complaint at times about tired too. Unless you're born a superwoman and you won't feel tired, if not don't tell me it's easy looking after babies. 

Look after and taking care is different. Look after is for a moment, for a short period. Taking care of is for lifetime, and it's almost a full time job. Which Mommies won't complain being tired of taking care of baby and also had to work? Like I say, unless you're born to be superwoman. I'm speechless than.

And, it's really funny when you know someone is telling you that if I complain about being tired, she wants to take care MY baby for me. It's really funny and stupid, because she simply don't understand the meaning of taking care. And it doesn't mean that you want to take care, MY baby will let you do so.

Mommy and Baby are bond together, when the Baby is in the Mommy womb. The baby hears the Mommy's heartbeat for nine months and the closest person to her is the Mommy, not even the Daddy.  Because the bond is there , the nine months bond is there. It's not like you as a stranger can take care of her.

BabyShervelle resemble me a lot, really a lot. 

The fiercest woman is a woman that fights for the kids, because none of the stranger out there deserve our kids, and deserved the chance to look after our kids for us even if we're tired. Therefore, never ever try touching my kids, because they're even precious than my life and they're the gems of mine.

& I don't wish to hear or sees again that you, slut, wants to look after my kids for me. If you ever dare to touch her, I will make sure I slap you real hard, and fight for my kids. However, before you want to have a child. Please do "market research" first, before having one. Because 300 singapore dollars is not enough to support a baby -.- ! 

Remember,

Nothing you do can separate the Mommy and Baby.

Because the bond is there and the bond is longer than anyone out there.

Second check up.

The First Trimester of Lil'2ndjoy.

 

Hello there, I'm back blogging about my Lil'2ndjoy. 

Everything was fine, and I saw my lil'2ndbaby heart beating and also, the doctor say everything should be fine:) Will be heading back for check up on the mid of November again. Hopefully, all is going to be fine! ^^v I can't wait for another 11 more weeks to know baby gender! Heh. Which is approx~ 2 more months? :) Probably around December? That's pretty fast! 

However, having lil'2ndbaby ain't easy): The morning sickness is really bad, and urination is getting frequent too! & now, I'm experiencing heartburn. OMG. It's not good at all. Insomnia. & next morning I can't wake up also. The pregnant symptoms is worst that having BabyShervelle.  Cos BabyShervelle, I don't have much symptoms other than feeling bloated and fatigue. 

Therefore, I'm hoping that my first trimester will end fast. It's about another 3 more weeks till it hits third month of pregnancy! And hopefully by than, my morning sickness won't be that bad and better not to have anymore!

Okay, I shall update about lil'2ndJoy again after the check up! :)
Loves.

♥ Smiling

♥ Smiling is never difficult -

but smiling when you're upset is never an easy task.

 

It's already 3am in the morning and I couldn't get to sleep. Still hanging out with my sister. I am tired but I can't let the mind rest, it's kind of torturing also. I'm so worn out, later still needs to go out to get the decorations for my babygirl's birthday. I'll definitely feel shag. Lucky tomorrow, I'm off from work! Phew ~ 

Anyway, I find that after I get out of those tiring life, I'm standing stronger and getting happier. It's actually a happy thing and I'm very surprised that I can walk out that fast. & I'm very glad that people around me are helping me and accompany me throughout this tough journey :') Thank you so much! 

I am still trying to stay strong and let go though I've let go part of it, but there are still some of it that is holding me back maybe due to the memories that I've mentioned and I also don't know how should I get rid of this memories, just wish that I can met Doreamon and ask help from him. LOL. How I wish. If can, I really wish to delete the bad one and keep the good one. 

However, at least I'm far better off than him. I still got my two precious Bs! While he left nothing. Some times I do pity him, but whenever I pity him, the thoughts will come in - "If I pity him, who is going to pity me? No one." Therefore, the pity him thoughts would just vanished/cleared away! I think the hatred is really strong that I want to kill him or leave this place.

If I can, I really wish I could leave this place. Probably to overseas to upgrade myself and start a new life over there and till I'm settle down and bring my kids over there but I don't think I can leave my parents :( Or maybe leave to other country for study purpose and take it as a chance to leave this place and clear up the memories?:) It would be nice too, hopefully I can. Even if I can, I don't think it would be now, probably after I give birth. 

Alright, till than .
Loves.